Saturday, November 12, 2005

Tabernac de calisse, putain!

Overtime: Leafs 5, Habs 4

I am the hockey fan equivalent of Job right now. The Canadiens outhustle, outmuscle, outplay, outshoot, outhouse the Leafs, and what do they get?
-a simply retarded Leafs tying goal with about 2 minutes left in the third: the puck was behind the net, the defenseman tried to clear it, it ricocheted off a Leafs player, flipped up over the net, hit Theodore in the back and dropped in the net behind him
-a too many men on the ice penalty in overtime: I, as well as the rest of the viewing world, am still wondering where the ref saw said man too many, as I could only count four red shirts (overtime is four on four)---this gave the Leafs a 4 on 3 power play, which set up the winning goal

So, smote by the game to which I so faithfully sacrifice countless a Saturday night, I ask why? why?! WHY?!

Yes, my red, white and blue obsession, as I've come to call it. You read of my elation at the Canadiens stealing the show in Buffalo last weekend, now you read of my dejection as the fruits of their labour are stolen from their hands and scoffed by a bunch of guffawing goons named Eric, Mats, Tie and Aki. My rage and frustration are so profound I can only give them voice by uttering my mother's curse of curses, the death word, the ferocious f...





Fiddlesticks.

8 comments:

Shauna said...

Can I offer some solace? I actually cared whether or not they won... and not because it had a direct impact on your mood, either. I honestly would have watched to the end, even if you hadn't been there. So, a small win to sweeten the bitter taste of defeat?

Janice said...

Okay, I see hockey and I am immediately deterred from reading whatever interesting or witty things you might have to say about the subject... But I must say that "ferocious fiddlesticks" might be one of the best phrases I've ever heard. I tip my hat to yer mom.

Ryan said...

Honey, I appreciate you rooting for my team and recognizing that their cause is just and mighty. Unfortunately I have to tell you that today I found out that Alex Kovalev, your favourite 'sneaky' player, has to have knee surgery and will be out of action for three or four weeks. I hope he's still sneaky when he returns.

See Janice, your sister is starting to understand the appeal of hockey. It's only a matter of time before you too will be checking scores and rearranging your life around the Canadiens' schedule. Yes, and I will develop a Patrick Stewart thing and rearrange my life around re-runs of The Next Generation. Hey, I'm already chess-obsessed, might as well get nerdier. ;)

Anonymous said...

Hey brother,

Sorry to leave this post here, but for some reason I don't have your most recent email addy saved; I got your unb addy, your stu addy, but not your newest. So, to make sure the reply doesn't get lost out into cyberspace:

Many thanks for your post. Still trying to catch up on all the emails I got as a result of that post; very surprising volume of responses. The reason I didn’t allow comments on it was because I figured people would post replies like Ryan’s and yours—not that I don’t appreciate them, but I’m just not the type to go looking for sympathy. Still, it was nice.

I agree with all you said there, and agree that sometimes I think I’ve gotten too tied up with the other part of publishing—the sales and the publicity and yadda yadda—and got away from why I, and you, and all writers, started in the first pace: because we dig writing, and find it’s maybe the best way we have of interpreting or commenting upon our world. And I’m over the whole Milwalkee debacle by now; thankfully, it was just a momentary melancholy that was soon swept away—with the help of your post, and some other nice messages from friends and even strangers.

And I know we talked in TO about your own writing, and how you sort of took a step away from it since leaving UNB, but are now getting back in the saddle. For my part, I never worried or had (and to this day do not have) any doubt that you would and will make your mark in publishing. It’s a matter of a few lucky breaks, and you’re off. It’s just a matter of when those breaks come. And really, you were such a young’un at UNB compared ot the rest of us graybeards, and still are relatively-speaking, so you’ve got lots of time to catch that break you’ve got coming. Needless to say, if there’s anything i can ever do to help out (granted, i might be able to help more with fiction than poetry) you’ve only got to let me know.

Okay, I just wanted to thank you for your post. Made my day. Seriously.

And on the topic of your blog, and this post: I was in TO when the Laffs got unholily (that’s probably not a word) SPANKED by the Senators—the day you were in town, in fact—and I have no clue how they managed to rebound from that crippling defeat and, weeks later, stun your Habs. And my mother’s “F” word was “Fuck-a-roo-roo.”

Very best, Craig.

Anonymous said...

What is going on in the cyberworld where all my writer friends are thrashing the Leafs? What is there to hate so much about? It can only be jealousy. By the way, Ryan, that movie post is loooooong. What are you, some kinda writer or somethin'? Thanks to Ian for pointing me to your blog. Oh and in Craig's comment, it says "Ryan's and yours." I think he cut and pasted that paragraph from an email he sent to me. Real genuine buddy.

Ok, enough with the anger. Peace man, sorry about Kovalev--the Habs will be ok without him. They have a solid squad this year.

Anonymous said...

Fiddlesticks again, Ry-guy!

The penalty call was valid, but the called-back goal made no sense, I will give you that.

Still, Mats rules. Go Leafs Go!

Ryan said...

This time it wasn't even funny---last time it could be blamed on horrible bad luck (the tying goal from behind the net)---but this time I think the zebras won it for the Leafs. Yes, the call on Rivet in overtime probably had to be made (though I think Antropov could have not fallen) but the disallowed goal was astonishing. They didn't even review the play, yet it was clear that Markov was hauled down by the Leafs defenseman, he never attempted to kick the puck or in any way redirect it, and the whistle blew after the puck was in the net. I have absolutely no idea why this wasn't a goal or at the very least a penalty. On top of that, did you happen to see how the Leafs played defense in their own end? Clutch, grab, hook, hold. I guess everyone else is bound by the new strict rule enforcement except the Leafs. Am I bitter? Yes, but I think rightfully so. That's two games the Leafs have had handed to them when they've been outplayed.

Anonymous said...

I don't know that the Leafs were out-played. Most of the first period they were the better team. Whatever, it's about time the Leafs were on the right side of a ridiculous call. I renounce my right to complain next time though.